Boring.

I may have mentioned that this past week was a busy one. And now I will prove to you how busy it's been:
I still have yet to watch The Bachelor: The Women Tell All, and all three episodes of American Idol.

Crazy, I tell you.

In addition to getting the house ready to put on the market, Josh and I have started using Rosetta Stone to learn French.
If you could see into our living room in the evening, you'd get a good laugh. The two of us with our laptops spitting out mangled pronunciations of French words.
We did find out that we will get to go to language school! I'm excited about that because of the following reasons:
1) It's in Monterey, California: beaches, warmth, proximity to Disney Land
2) Josh will be getting paid to learn a new language, and I think that's pretty cool
3) I will also get to audit the course if space is available, or the Air Force will pay for a tutor or learning program for me
4) Did I mention the warm weather?

There is a French course starting both mid-July and at the end of Sept, so now you know as much as I do about when we'll be leaving here. We'll wait to hear which one we've been assigned to.

This next week likely wont be slowing down either. I plan to finish the last of the house cleaning & organizing, and make our sale flyer. Then on the weekend we need to power-wash the siding and add some more rocks to the landscaping.  Hopefully we'll have it on the market by Mar 8th. Then comes the fun part of trying to keep it clean around here despite the two little disasters who call this place home.

Can I apologize now for an informative yet completely boring post? I think my writing suffers when I haven't gotten my reality TV fix.
I'll correct that and be back.

Au Revoir
(just say it while pretending to hock a loogie and you'll have it down)

First Haircut

Today Derek had his first official haircut.
He's had his hair cut before, of course, but only in our bathroom hair studio.
Remember the summer 'do?

I think it might make a reapperance this summer, just for fun.
Sorry Grandmas, I know you weren't big fans.

Of course I brought my camera along, because I'm that mom who photographs everything.
Before picture:

Despite that smile, Derek wasn't really sure about the whole haircut idea.
Even after Daddy sat down with him.

But then he realized that the clippers tickled a little, and that was kind of fun. The man cutting his hair was quite nice. Wish I had caught his name.

He still had to pretend that he wasn't having a good time though, just to get some sympathy. And a lollipop.

Big sister watched the proceedings.

Today was parent day at her school. I went and she gave me lessons in a craft and some shelf-work. Then she made me a snack.
I have to be honest, I have a hard time eating things made by 4-year-olds.
Even my own.
Because I've seen her eat her boogers, and I wouldn't put it past her to think that I might want to eat them too. But it was a fun time. I love her little school. Her teachers are so patient and soft-spoken.

It must be a shock to her system to come home each day.

Ahem, back to the haircut.
So here was the finished product:

Oh that boy. He melts my heart.

Speaking of melt, I have to go get some of that pizza with the melting cheese before my husband eats it all.

Erin Schore, out.

Bleuets

So the last couple of days have been keeping me busy.
Besides the usual stuff (preschool taxiing, a trip to Boise, grocery shopping, Bible Study, doctors appt, post office, etc.), I've been trying to sneak some time online to learn about the area in Quebec where we'll be living.
If you know me well, you know that I love to research and plan things.
For our trip to Disney last spring, I think I spent more hours online researching all the tips and info about Disney World than we actually spent there in Orlando.
Sure, it was overkill, but if you wanted to know which side of the line to get in at each specific ride in the parks to reduce your wait time,  I was your girl. (Obsessive-compulsive much?)
Of course, you can't plan for everything. If that were possible, then I would have brushed up on the local ICU's before we left.

Anyway, I've been trying to research the Lac-Saint-Jean, or Saguenay, region but I'm running into some trouble: namely, all the websites are in French.

Me no speaka frencha. But me learna.

Despite the language barrier, the pictures of the region are beautiful.
(I just have this nagging suspicion that they were all taken in the summer.)

But I keep plugging away online. I needed one thing to get excited about. To really get me ready to be a Quebecer for a couple of years. To help me think past the little weather issue.

And today I found it:
Ladies and Gentlemen,
The very same Saguenay-Lac-Saint-Jean region in which we will be living is renowned for it's...

...wait for it...

...wait for it...

...BLUEBERRIES.

Yes sir.
That's all I needed to hear. They grow wild around the entire region, and I read an article that described biking around a beautiful lake while stopping to pick fresh blueberries and raspberries.
Do you know my love of berries?

It's my love language.

In college I would walk 45 minutes to the far side of the arboretum where raspberries grew. It was worth the 90-minute round trip. Because my love of berries ran as deep as my cheapness in refusing to purchase them in a store.
And now, they will be at my fingertips. Alex and I shall be in heaven.
The boys, not so much.
But they're weird.

I mean, who doesn't love blueberries?

This guy:

He prefers pretzels.

But my girl shares my love of berries. Here she is at 2, enjoying some blueberry jam. She was enjoying it so much that she even tucked one little blueberry up her right nostril to save for later.

 

So for all of you out there wondering when we're leaving, if we are going to language school first, if the kids and I can accompany Josh to the training in Cold Lake, Alberta, and how long we will be in Canada, I can tell you this: We have no idea. But. There will be blueberries. 

Nuff said.

Surprise! (For real this time) Part 2

Now that I've had my fun leaving the bloggy world hanging...

So Josh came home from work yesterday and had found out our assignment.

First allow me to give you some background information.
Our first choice in assignments was to do a foreign flying exchange, where Josh would work with another country's Air Force. This sounded like a fun adventure to me, and we ranked our choices based on what was available this assignment cycle. The choices were bases in England, Germany, France, and Canada.

Here's where I went wrong folks.

Josh and I agreed that France would be our number one choice, mostly because it's located close to Euro-Disney.
It's about priorities people.

Enter my mistake: I allowed Josh to rank our second choice based on the aircraft that he wanted to fly. As if his job should factor in to where I want to live.

And so he did.
And so we got our second choice.
And while it's such a blessing to have been selected for a flying exchange at all...his second choice would probably have been my last choice.

Because my friends, I do not enjoy the cold.
And we shall be cold. 

Very, very cold.

Have you guessed our assignment? If you're exceptionally slow, or have been drinking heavily, let me spell it out for you:

At our next assignment, the local population is 99% French speaking.
At our next assignment, the average high during the hottest month of the year is 75 degrees.
At our next assignment, the average high during the coldest month of the year is 13 degrees.
Yes, I said the high was 13 degrees.

We will be heading out to work with the Canadian Air Force in Bagotville, Quebec!
No giggles please, I'm sure it's pronounced Ba-go-veel or something like that. Umm, right? Anyone out there speak French?
Note to self: Have Josh pick up the French Rosetta Stone at the base tomorrow.

Josh will be flying this thing:

Which I am told is the F-18 Hornet.
But I've never been that good at airplane identification, so don't hold me to it.

We don't have any details yet as to exactly when we'll be going. We're waiting to find out if we get to go to language school as well.
So now half of the waiting is over, and hopefully the details will be filled in soon.

So now I'm free to concentrate on getting our house ready to put on the market. Sounds like fun, don't you think?

Happy Tuesday,
Shivering in anticipation in Idaho.

Surprise! (For real this time) Part 1

We got our next assignment!

Here's a clue:

Any guesses where we'll be??

Surprise!

Ha! I bet for half a second I just made some of you think that we either:

A) Found out our assignment
or
B) Are pregnant

I can assure you that neither of those things is true.
Though one of them would be nice.
And not the one that will wake us up in the middle of the night.

No, this surprise is much better, it's a...

Dollar Store grab bag!

Eh?

Several months ago I was in the dollar store.
Don't make fun of me, other than Walmart, it's the only store in town.
I purchase all of my latest fashions there.
Well, maybe not. But they do have an exciting assortment of coloring books.
Anyway, as I was checking out the clerk asked if I'd like to donate a food item to the local pantry. I said sure, and they grabbed an item from the end of the register, put it into the collection bin, I paid my dollar, end of story.
So fast forward to a few weeks ago when I needed some fancy lingerie for Valentine's Day, and I found myself back at the dollar store.
As I was checking out, the clerk asked if I'd like a child's grab bag. She said it contained store items that had come out of their packaging or something.
I wasn't really listening, I was trying to keep Derek away from the candy dispensers in case he started messing with the ones that held the reese's peices and had an allergic reaction.
I misunderstood. I thought the grab bag was to donate to needy kids.
I was wrong. The grab bag came home with me.
Or should I say, the grab bag was left forgotten in the van until a few days ago.
Curiousity got the best of me and I opened up that little bag to see what manner of goodies it might hold.

Try to contain your excitement. Here it is:

What do we have here?

A shiny...thing.

No idea what it is, or was. It seems to serve no purpose. It might be a broken kaleidoscope, or maybe a lipstick holder without the lipstick.

Here we have three crayons.

The most promising thing yet-- a film camera made from the finest plastic.

 

And, one white adult shoelace. 

 

Boy did they outdo themselves putting this bag together.
I'm glad it wasn't a donation, I'd be embarrassed to have been the giver of this gift.

So Surprise! It's Monday! We don't know our assignment yet! We're not having any more babies! It's 3pm and I haven't showered! It's cold outside but I'm making Josh grill steaks when he gets home tonight at 7pm! Because I want some zip sauce! If you haven't had zip sauce you haven't lived! Everything can be made fun and exciting with an exclamation point!

Except that grab bag. Nothing could have made that exciting.

Later,
Surprising in Idaho


p.s. Yes, I was kidding about the lingerie. I stick strictly to second-hand stores for items that are worn next to my most private regions.

p.p.s. I couldn't even type that last line without getting the heebiegeebies.

The Baritone

I may have mentioned a time or ten that I'm kind of a softie when it comes to this guy.

 

Unfortunately he's on to me. 

He's figured out that mama is just a touch in love with him, and he can get away with a little naughtiness from time to time. 

So I've had to toughen up and lay down the law. 

But ever since Josh returned from his deployment it's become glaringly obvious that the boy listens better to his daddy than he does to me. 

Josh says it's his baritone. He likes to show off.
Today he had a deep-voiced discussion before naptime about how Derek needed to lay down and go right to sleep. 

He did. 

Josh is also good at getting him to eat. He just pulls out the deep voice and Derek shrinks down in his chair and shovels some food in. 

The other day when Josh was at work, I was getting frustrated with Derek's refusal to eat his dinner. 

Alex looked at me and said "We need Daddy's baritone."

Smartie pants.

I can't let my parenting partner show me up. I'm off to acquire some testosterone pills.

I'll get that baritone one way or another. 

And probably some extra body hair to go with it.

On second thought, maybe I'll just be satisfied with second-in-command.

I have enough trouble keeping my legs shaved as it is.

Just Stuff

Here is a picture:

I call it "Two Kids and a Fridge on a Friday Morning."
I enjoy naming my photos. Makes me feel like an artist.

I can't really say why they stopped for a photo right in front of the refrigerator, but they decided on their own to hold hands, so I was all for it. If they held hands in front of my dirty shower and wanted me to take a picture, I would.
Only I probably wouldn't post it on the blog.
I do have some standards you know.
My messy sink, yes. Pantry full-o-crap, yes.
But not the shower. That's just too personal. And too gross.
Someone remind me to clean that thing please.

Doesn't Derek look like a little punk in that picture?
I think it's because he is.
He's in his bed not napping. Again.
5th day in a row.
He is also getting his last 2-year-molar and is being quite the stinker.
His teeth have all come in one at a time.
That God. He has one crazy sense of humor.
If it isn't eyebrow duplicity, it's one tooth at a time.

In other news, I am going out to dinner tonight with some girlfriends. Yippee!
My friend Nikki is turning 30 tomorrow and tonight we shall celebrate with some chit-chat and raw fish.
What could be better?
Josh has been spoiling me lately with girls' nights. I think I forgot to mention that the movie & dinner I wanted to go on in this post, did indeed pan out.

Thanks baby! I'll bring you my leftover sushi.
(If I have any. I'm saving up my hungry for this dinner.)

Happy Friday to You!

Three Things Thursday: Wednesday Edition

1) I've had a nagging cough for over a week now.
It's not just any cough.
No, this is the cough of a heavy smoker with bronchitis.
I may even have tuberculosis, though it has not been confirmed.

The good news: The constant coughing is helping my Ab Revolution Resolution. Who knew?

The bad news: My bladder. She's not what she used to be.
At Bible study this morning I drank a bottle of water, a cup of tea, and a cup of coffee.
Then I drove to pick Alex up from school.
Then I had a coughing spasm.
Then I thought that if they were to market a Depends-like product to women who have borne children, had full bladders, and body-racking coughs, I might be interested in purchasing them.
Just a thought.

2) Dear Makers of Ring-Pops,
I don't like your product. They are sticky, awkward to eat, and a big pain in my rear.
Sincerely,
Incontinent in Idaho.

Alex asked if she could eat one piece of Valentine's Day candy before quiet time. I agreed. She chose a ring pop.
A blue ring pop no less.

One hour later, she was still sucking on that thing.
Her mouth may be permanently discolored, and that's 30 minutes of quiet time I'm never getting back.

3) This is a cat licking it's private regions:

This is not my cat, though it is my backyard. I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm the kind of person who would see a stray cat doing unmentionable things in my backyard, take a picture of it, and then mention it to you.
Your welcome.

That concludes this episode of Three Things Thursday: Wednesday Edition.

Tune in next week for Four Things Friday: Monday Edition.

Boys.

Today, as I watched Derek do a few things that I've never seen his sister do, I wondered to myself: How do boys know how to be boys?

He was certainly never taught that a shirtsleeve can be a substitute for a tissue. He must have been born knowing it.
I also didn't indicate to him that not wearing pants makes it easy to slide your hand in the side of your diaper and announce to the room that "Hey! Dat's my penis in der!" Again, innate knowledge.
And, for your enjoyment, here is the way that my son shovels in his favorite snack (or in tonight's case, his dinner. Hey, it's a veggie, right?)



Things of note in that video:
1) The strange contraption in the background is my vacuum with a bath towel draped over it. Classy, I know.
2) The messy room behind Derek belongs to his sister. But in the interest of being honest, mine is in worse shape.
3) I love that our tile floor has dark grout. Really, I wouldn't ever choose differently. I'm sure the reason why is obvious.
4) Don't you love that the first thing you see when Alex pops in front of the screen is her mouthful of popcorn? I guess girls aren't that much better.

Bloggy Block

You know.
It's like writer's block for a blog.
And I've got it.

I'm blaming it on the fact that every third thought that goes through my head alternates between "I wonder what our next assignment is?" and some thought related to selling our house.
These are taking the place of my typical every third thought, which is something immensely entertaining and amusing that I then share with you.

You do find my thoughts entertaining and amusing, right?

Right?

*crickets chirping*

Well no one's forcing you to read, you know.
(But don't stop, okay? It makes me feel all warm and gooey inside.)

Today is the end of a 4-day weekend for us, and I'm feeling like I need a weekend to recover from it. 
Josh and I went skiing together on Friday, and then we took the kids up with us today for another family day on the mountain. 
We got Alex a formal ski lesson this time. 

Remember soccer?
It went a little bit like that.  

She must have gotten wind of the fact that we wanted her to have fun and learn something, so she went out of her way to make sure that didn't happen. 
But she ended up having a good day, and even made a little progress. 

I wonder what our assignment is?

Sorry. Told you I can't stop thinking about it. 
But I can't. 
You know why? 
Because someone out there knows. 
And it's not me. 
But I want it to be me. 
But only if it's an assignment that I want. 
If not, they can keep it to themselves. 

Where was I? See, this is why I have bloggy block. 

I need to go clean some baseboards or something. 
I have a house to sell, you know. 


And a new assignment coming. 


Did I mention that?





 
 

My Day in Bullet Format

• This morning, Derek swiped his cereal bowl right off the breakfast bar.
• I think it was an accident, but cannot verify.
• His spoon was located about 10 feet from the bowl
• Milk was everywhere in between.
• I find soy milk to be stickier than cow's milk.
• I love a good Sunday morning challenge. 
• Still made it to church on time.
• I stayed for the second service because the nursery was short handed.
• Maybe I was feeling prideful for my good deed.
• I was put in my place.
• One.
• Two.
• Three poopy diapers in a 30 minute span.
• The upside: I no longer had a craving for any Valentine's chocolate.
• No children napped today in my house.
• As I type this, Josh is watching an incredibly gory movie.
• This Valentines Day will be remembered for poop and blood. 
• Hope you all had a wonderful Hallmark holiday.

Party On

Today Alex and I went to a birthday party for one of her preschool classmates.

When I was little, birthday parties meant cake and ice cream with a little pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey. Maybe some stickers to play with and a goody bag at the door.

These days, that just wouldn't cut it. Inflatable gyms and indoor amusement parks are more the standard. And folks are getting creative out there.
Today's party was super cute and just perfect for a girly girl.
Can you guess?

It was held at a local beauty salon, and all the girls got facials, make-up, and nail painting.

Yes, you heard me correctly.
My 4-year-old had a facial today.

Has her mother ever had a facial?
Nope.
I almost pushed her out of the chair and took her place. It seems logical that the one with the visible pores should be the one to get the facial, wouldn't you say?

It really was a sweet little party, and perfect for such a nice birthday girl. Isn't she cute?

Did I mention that it was a pajama party?

Question.
Is it okay to be jealous of a preschooler's hair?
Is this girl beautiful or what?

Here's Alex with one foot...

and now two feet...

...in the door of a career as a stripper.
 Maybe I should have given PtB a little more credit when she thought of these.

Not sure what exactly they put in those whipped-cream topped strawberry sodas, but looks like someone had one too many, wouldn't you say?

That proves it. You let them wear makeup and it's all downhill from there. The binging and imbibing.

All of the girls had so much fun.

The downside is that now Alex knows more of what the world of birthday parties holds, and she's going to be expecting something big come May.

Previously my party planning thoughts were as follows:
- How do I get away without throwing one?
- If I throw one, how do I time it so that I'm not expected to feed people?
- Is there a party out there in which the children are watched and the mom's get facials?

I've got 3 months to chew it over.

Grocery Shopping

I have never been able to figure out why, but I can say definitively that grocery shopping is one of my least favorite domestic duties. This was true even before I had children.
 There's just so much that goes into it.

And because my life is not interesting, and I have nothing newsworthy to share with you, I am going to delve deep into the world of grocery shopping to some of it's more thought-provoking aspects.

 1) Preparation
This might be the worst part for me. I know I mentioned that I enjoy making lists, but I have to clarify: I would rather make a to-do list for my day that includes "make grocery list", than actually sit down and think up meals.
Because that, my dear friends, is the hardest part of the whole endeavor.
I'm sure I've cooked more than 5 meals in our 8+ years of marriage, but darn if I can come up with them when I sit down to make my list.
So then I'll browse online looking for new recipes. The criteria include: easy, quick, and only ingredients that I recognize. I can't tell you the trouble I had the first time I looked for pimentos in the store. I almost just bought olives so I could dig them out of the middle.

Once I finally get a list together, I attempt to clear out the fridge and pantry of those almost-empty items and science projects that are taking up space.
This is what happens when I neglect that step:

Point 1: Three boxes of fruit snacks. Two of which have only one package left in them.
Point 2: Box of Ritz crackers. Actual cracker count: 3
Point 3: This one's off-topic, but Josh often takes a can of pineapples into work and calls it "lunch". He works for 12-14 hours a day. Then he comes home and eats an entire casserole and says "Is there anything else for dinner?" This leaves me with no leftovers to send in with him for lunch and then the vicious cycle starts again.
Point 4: Bag of chips that contains 2 whole chips and the crumbs of tens of chips. Read on to find out why this is my husband's fault.
Point 5: New loaf of bread thrown hastily on top of old molding bread.

Get the picture?

2)Unloading your cart
This is a point of contention between Josh and I. Typically I find segregation appalling.
In this case, however, it is the only acceptable way to take on this task. Frozen should be kept with frozen, toilet paper should not be torn away from it's friend the tissue box. Keep the canned brothers together. Joshua, do you know what you do to me when you send our Baked Tostitos down the belt followed by the gallon of milk? You are dooming them I tell you.
Bread and tampons do not go together.
Sigh.
I fear it is genetic. Pat the Bunny does the same thing.
(ps- I've been missing 'ol PtB around here, haven't you? After all, without her, the Boy Scouts of America may never get to camp.)

3) Paper or Plastic
Does anyone else out there feel guilty when asked "paper or plastic" and you choose plastic?

Confession: 90% of the time I know I'm going to ask for plastic. They are so dang handy for lining trashcans and wrapping up poopie diapers.
But I sense the bagger's displeasure at my choice.
When they ask me what I want I pretend like I'm thinking it over and then say "Hmmm...plastic today, please." As if it is a rare day that I ask for it.
Deceitful. Wicked.
*head hung in shame*

But I've heard it's not easy being green.
I'm doing my best not to find out.

4) I'm sorry that I just posted about grocery shopping. I promise I'll try to do better next time.

Sincerely,
Boring in Idaho

Abraham is not good for my uterus.

So today is Wednesday, the day of my Bible study.
We are doing the Beth Moore series on the Patriarchs.

There are some great ladies, Derek has fun at the childcare, there are yummy snacks and tea.
The only problem: My uterus.

I like to consider it retired. It produced two children that are relatively normal.
If normal includes the need to wear a princess dress and fairy wings every day.

And an obsession about three specific "aminals" without whom the earth would cease to spin.

However, this group of women at Bible study is giving my retired uterus some pangs.
New babies are everywhere.

Today I sat behind a girl that was nursing her baby.
When he came out from under the hooter hider, he had that sleepy-drunk look I remember so well. His cheek was flushed and he let out the sweetest wet burp as soon as he was propped on his mama's shoulder.
His head looked so soft.
To my left was baby Cora, all snugly sleeping on her mama.
Behind me little Mirabella was being rocked in her mother's arms.
Crista was sitting at the table, with her cute pregnant belly.

Abraham is not good for my uterus.

But I have a saving grace.
Last night, for the first time ever, my monitor picked up the neighbor's frequency. At 3:15am I heard the soft mewing of their new baby girl. At first I had assumed I was hearing Derek, but as the little cries persisted I could tell that it was definitely not him.
And for a second I remembered the torture that is sleep deprivation.
And it all came flooding back. The morning sickness, the fatness, the fussy evening times, never getting to sit down and eat dinner, being tied down with napping schedules, the hemorrhoids.
Sorry, too much info?
Just keeping it real.

I think God knew that I needed that 3:15 wake-up call before the full-on reproductive onslaught I was subjected to today.

Amen.

Jonah

For about a year now, I've been following a blog from the Williams family in North Carolina. I don't know them personally, though after reading along for so long, I kind of feel as if I do.

Matt and Patrice's first son Gabe was stillborn just a few weeks before his due date. Their second son, Jonah, will be turning a year old soon.
Sweet Jonah has a medical condition called Epidermolysis Bullosa (EB), which was also likely the cause of the Gabe's death.
As a nurse I can say that there are very few conditions out there as cruel as this one. Jonah's skin and mucous membranes are so fragile that a mere touch will cause his skin to blister and slough off. The disease is often fatal, and the daily implications are far reaching.

I'm so guilty of taking for granted the health of my children, and Matt and Patrice are so inspirational in the selfless way they care for their baby boy.

Later this month, there will be an auction going on at this site to raise money for EB research, and hopefully find a cure for this terrible disease.

Consider stopping by and bidding on some of the great items that have been donated!

Monday

Update:


It is 6:52pm.
I have not showered.
Or dusted.


I did take care of the bathroom situation, and was forced to deal with the floor because couscous was on the dinner menu tonight. 


Apparently my Monday motivation only extends to early afternoon. 
Who knew?

Original Post:

It's not a very popular opinion, but I'm going to go ahead and share with you guys that I like Mondays.

Weird, huh?

Not sure what it is, but I am much more motivated on Monday than on any other day of the week.
After taking a weekend break from most of the housework, I find that I'm eager to jump in and get things settled and cleaned on Monday.

I'm ready to take on the world, one load of laundry at a time.
Nothing can deter me.

Not this mess on the floor under the kids' chairs

Not the desperate need for a dust-busting

Not...whatever it is that happened in the kids' bathroom

Not checking on Derek when he's supposed to be napping and seeing this face that says, "I wouldn't put money on me actually sleeping Mom."

Nope. I will handle it all. And by the end of the day this place will be whipped into shape.

Today I punched a little harder at kickboxing class, I got my volunteer work at the church accomplished, I'm going to get some Bible study homework done, and just maybe I'll take a shower before 4pm.

On a Monday I can change the world.

As far as the rest of the week, well, I'm lucky if I can change the sheets.

******************************************************************************************************************************
Anniversary Announcement!

It's been one month since the 8-Minute Abs Revolution Resolution, which now goes by that name. 

I haven't missed a day yet. Also, somewhere under the layer(s) of adipose tissue on my abdomen, I think my stomach muscles are getting stronger. 

But my kickboxing instructor said that it took 6 months of daily ab workouts to see some visible results, so I'm sticking with it. 
If you could see her abs you'd take her word for it, too. 


Anyone out there still Starbucks eligible?? 


*******************************************************************************************************************************

I will leave you with this Deep Thought by Jack Handy Erin

Today during kickboxing class, the song Hip to be Square by Huey Lewis & the News came on.

I thought to myself, if it is actually hip to be square, then what am I doing taking a kickboxing class?

I can accomplish that with some ice cream.

Thank you, this has been your Deep Thought moment of the day.

You Lie

I'm always surprised at how much little ears hear when you don't notice they're hanging around.

Much to my displeasure, I have a scale in my bathroom.
Most mornings I weigh myself, question the validity of the results, and proceed with my routine.

The kids get on the scale from time to time.

The other day, Derek stepped up on the scale, pointed to the red arrow, and said "You lie!"

Apparently he has witnessed my Joe Wilson moments in the mornings.

He makes me laugh.

A Train of Thoughts

Today is Friday, but all day I thought it was Saturday.
Probably because I went skiing today.
I've done more skiing in the last 3 weeks than I have in the last 3 years.
Josh kept the kids because he had the day off and didn't feel good enough to ski.
I like that guy.
I scalped his ticket at the mountain.
It felt dangerous and illegal.
Is it still considered scalping if you sell it for the same price you bought it for?
I skied with some girlfriends.
We all work out together at the gym, but we all share a love of eating less than healthy foods.
We had Subway and french fries for lunch.
And hot chocolate.
We picked up a pizza on the way home.
And fun drinks from Sonic.
The children were alive and well when I got home, but hungry for dinner.
I fed Derek rice because he likes it and he doesn't like much.
I regretting feeding Derek rice when I saw that there were grains scattered all around the house.
Apparently they were stuck to his butt.
I vacumed them up, and tried to be happy that he was eating, even if it was messy.
He is still wearing the same size diapers that he wore when he was 4 months old.
He's a normal-sized 2 year old.
He was a gargantuan 4 month old.
Today in the bath Alex laughed and said that Derek was hurting his penis.
He smiled at me and said "I squeeze it mama."
Weird little monkey.
Tomorrow we are going to Monkey Bizness in Boise for a birthday party.
The girls in the squadron are having a movie & dinner tomorrow night.
I kind of want to go, but feel bad asking my sick husband to watch the kids again.
So I'll just post this and see what happens.
Maybe he'll read it and tell me to go.
I'll let you know.

Home/Child for Sale

Today Alex and Derek were chatting as they ate lunch.

She told him that when he was four, he could go to Ms Jennifer's class and he would learn how to use the shelf-work.

"Right, Mom?"she asked me.

I decided that I should probably start introducing the idea of moving to her, so I told her that we wont be living in Mountain Home when Derek is 4.

She thought about that for a minute and said,

"Well when we live somewhere else, who is going to be Derek's mommy and take him to Ms Jennifer's class?"

Apparently she though that he'd be staying behind with the house.

What's Next?

Remember back in September when I wrote about our next move coming up?

Since we ended up extending here at that time, I was able to push those thoughts aside and buy some more condiments.
My sandwiches have been much more satisfying since then.

But of course, all good things must come to an end.

Sometime in the next few weeks, we should be receiving an assignment.
Exciting and scary all at the same time.

I mean, who wouldn't want a group of folks in a room far away to get together and decide where they want you to work and live for the next 3 years?

The possibilities are pretty much wide open, from a number of overseas potentials to some more familiar places in the States.

But I do believe that until we get a when and where, I will go back to the rationing of condiments and cleaning products.

(That last one shouldn't be any trouble.)

My Busy Day

It has been a busy day for me.

I have to say "for me" at the end of that sentence, because my schedule today would probably be considered a normal day for most people.
However, I personally find that having more than one activity planned in my day is overstimulating.

I'm like an infant that way.

So I did not end up kicking any boxes this morning.
I had forgotten that a women's Bible study was starting up and I wanted to participate. I headed there after dropping Alex off at preschool.
It's a Beth Moore study, and if any of you have ever done one before, you know that it comes with a good amount of daily homework.
I'm hoping that the homework will encourage me to spend my time more wisely. Because I'll tell you a secret:
Sometimes I'm not the best at that.

What with all the television watching, internet browsing, and Oreo consuming I've been doing lately.

Yesterday I went to our church and volunteered my services there once a week, just to do whatever little things need to be done and can be done with a 2-year-old in tow.

They put me to work converting a room into the new Sunday School space for the 4 &5 year olds. I didn't get it quite finished, so after the Bible study I headed there and finished it up.
It was kind of fun to decorate the bulletin boards and arrange the tiny little chairs and tables.
Derek narrarated my every move and I taught him that when decorating, less is more.
No one wants a cluttered bulletin board, right?

Right?
I'm a little worried I messed it up.

Then I picked up Alex and headed home for lunch and naps.

Just after the kids went down, Josh came home.
News of the unfortunate: He is sick.

It is probably definitely my fault. As you may recall, I came down with a sinusy-head-coldy-sore-throaty-type-thing the day he came home.
So I had been keeping my distance as far as the whole "making-out" thing was concerned.

I felt a little like Julia Roberts' character in Pretty Woman. You know, the way she, um... entertained...clients while not kissing them.

Sorry. We can just pretend I never said that.

Anyway, we finally decided I was safe to kiss and we made out like teenagers.
Apparently I was not yet clear of germs.

A few things about my husband:
- He is a wonderful spouse
- He is a loving father
- He is great at flying the F-15
- He is incredibly intelligent

But I must share with you that:
- He is a terrible sick person

I would actually prefer that I get sick instead of him.
Unless of course, there is nausea and/or vomiting involved, in which case he can be the sick one.
Darling?
I hope you feel better soon.
Really I do.
No, really.

Really.

Anywho, after he arrived home, I took the opportunity to run some errands while kid-free.
I had to go to the base for a number of reasons, not the least of which was to get some things accomplished at the hospital.

Here is a reinactment of a phone conversation I had the other day with a nurse at the clinic:
Background Info- My thyroid has been eating itself since 2002, which is when I was started on thyroid medication.

Me: Hi, Nurse. I need a refill of my thyroid medication. I know that you will want a recent lab result before refilling my prescription, so I took it upon myself to get that ordered and done last week.

Nurse: Well, if only every patient was as wonderful and proactive as you, my job would be a lot easier.

Okay, she didn't really say that, but I'm sure it's what she was thinking. She actually said something to the effect of: Let me look up the results.

Long, quiet pause.

Nurse: Um. I've never seen this before.

Me: Well that can't be good.

Nurse: It seems that the lab that was ordered wasn't the correct one. This one is for a parathyroid garbldegook.

She had never heard of it before.

Me: Well, is it at least normal?

Nurse: Actually, no.

Me: Hmmm.

Nurse: But it might be normal that it's not normal, for someone who is on thyroid medication.

Me: Well how about you order me up the right test, and if in between now and then you realize that I'm actually dying, give me a jingle.
Thanks.

So today I was going in to get my labs redrawn and get a supply of medicine to get me through until those results are available.

But silly me, it's the first Wednesday of the month.
You know, the day that the hospital closes at noon.

So instead I went to the BX (the base store) and made up for my lack of productivity at the hospital by getting some really good deals on winter apparel for the kids.

Winter Coat w/ Snow Bib for Derek: $9.75

Pink Coat for Alex: $2.50

Super-big pink coat for Alex: $8.25

Alex has only 2 requests when I buy her stuff. She'd like it pink, or pink.
Actually purple is okay too. See?

 

And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, was My Busy Day.
Still on the docket for tonight: baths, bedtimes, and LOST.

I may need to be placed into a darkened room lest I get so overstimulated that I can't sleep.

And in honor of the beef burgundy we had for dinner tonight, I will say to you all--

Keep it classy, San Francisco.
name that movie.

I hurt.

So I ended up taking last week off of the gym, since Josh was home and off work.

Yesterday I took a kickboxing class.
And let me tell you, I kicked the crap out of that box. Or, I would have if there was an actual box to kick.
I kept my core tight and punched hard.
I was a champion.

(I'm comparing this to my usual kickboxing effort, which has more to do with watching the clock and having childcare than any motivation to get fit.)

Then today I took a weight class. You know, like squats and lunges and dumbbells and pushups and pain.

I was completely spent at the end of the class. And within the hour, I was completely sore.

Now I'm moving around like I'm 80 years old and moaning with every move I make.
It is not good.

I predict that I may have to roll out of bed tomorrow because I might not be able to stand up.
But I'll have to get up, because I have to get Alex to school before the 9 o'clock kickboxing class.

I'm bringing it ladies.

And I'm not buying any more Oreos either.

It's time to get serious.

Now I'm going to go take a hot shower and loosen up a bit. Then I'm going to curl up on the couch with some ice cream.

You didn't think I was going cold-turkey did you?

A few (more) things.

1) My son is in the midst of a torrid love affair with breakfast meats. Bacon and sausage rock his world.

 

With Alex, I would have worried about how unhealthy that food was. And though I do get the turkey bacon and the all-natural sausage for him, I really don't think too much about it. 

Because, 1 year ago, he wasn't eating anything. 

And as you can see below, he went from being the fattest baby on earth at 2 months and in the 98th percentile...

  

...to being a rather skinny-looking toddler in the 13th percentile at 15 months. 

*Cue photo of expensive prescription formula*

That's when Derek started on formula for the first time in his little life. For he was a boob man. And because of his tendency to be allergic to the world, his momma got the priveledge of eating the world's crappiest diet for a year. 

Click here to see my reintroduction to the world of cheese. It was a great day in my life.

  

So for over a year now, Derek has been drinking the Elecare, and racking up these receipts for said substance. Care to guess the total cost??

 

Oh, about $15,000.
Yes, I counted the right amount of zeros. 
I do believe that it should be illegal for 15 months of formula to cost that much, don't you?
And you know what else?
No matter what I hear from other folks who don't appreciate military healthcare, I will never rip Tricare.
Because they have paid for every.single.drop.

And since eating is still a bit of a challenge for Derek, if he wants to strip down and roll around in a pool of bacon, I say okay. As long as he eats some while he's in there.

2) These are my handsome guys all ready for church and taking a moment to read the always-riveting Little White Duck.

  

Hey D, do you ever get tired of that book?

  

I'll take that as a no. 

3) This is what you end up with when you realize it's Jan 28th, you don't have a 2010 calendar, and you take your 4-year-old daughter with you to get one. 

  

Oh well, at least it was marked down to $2.50.

4) Does this happen to you?

  

5) Alex and Derek have been disappearing into their bedrooms and playing together, nicely, for long stretches of time. So I choose to ignore that this is what happens while they're in there. 

  

6) I keep feeling as if there's something I should be doing right now, but I can't quite put my finger on it.