Day 141

I'm working hard to get us settled back in at home. Many thanks to our family for rearranging their lives and taking us in for the last 10 weeks!
I know they enjoy the chance to be with the kids, but let's face it, nobody really wants company for that long.
Especially company that leaves town after passing along a stomach bug.
Yuck.

Alex spent all day Sunday on a recliner with a bucket, and apparently passed the illness along to Aunt Jessie and Uncle John.
So sorry, guys.
We all know that I have vomit-phobia, so I certainly feel terrible inflicting that on anyone.

Really, Michigan is not the place to be right now for the weak of stomach. My sister's kids are also down with a flu bug, along with many of their school chums.

This has been a Public Health Service Announcement: Stay away from Michigan. 

Meanwhile, back at the ranch-style home in North Carolina, we had quite the productive day. But as I look around at the house you would never know it. There remains much to be done.

Baby steps, people.
Baby steps.

I had a lovely deep sleep in my own bed last night. Almost perfect, if only it had my marido in it.

(That's Spanish for husband. You didn't know this would be a learning experience, did you?)

My friend Amy had kindly brought over some milk and bagels yesterday, so we had breakfast and the kids reacquainted themselves with the playroom while I got to work.
I tackled their rooms today, clearing out outgrown clothes before unloading the suitcases.
I'm definitely feeling the need to pare down our belongings before the next couple of moves.

Then we headed out for grocery shopping and a car wash, which is pretty much the highlight of my children's existence.
The car wash, that is, not the grocery shopping.

According to Derek, grocery shopping is the "baddest thing in the whole world."
Yet, he never complains when there is food to eat. Odd.

Grocery shopping is the event during which I most regret homeschooling. They sit all smashed together in the "rocketship cart" and poke and prod and sing the silliest things you've ever heard over and over and over again, until I give apologetic looks to the passing shoppers and say "Oh, sometimes I regret taking this babysitting job."

The times when I most appreciate homeschooling are every weekday at 6:45am when I'm not getting out of bed.

Were you expecting something sappy about watching my daughter learn?
Yeah. Wrong blog.

And oh, the glorious weather. The kids were outside this afternoon playing, and requested popsicles because they were "sweaty."
Crazy! I can't believe it's February. But I'm glad it's February, because now I can say that my hubby should be back next month.
We're finally close enough to let the kids make the traditional paper chain.

Though that does look a wee bit depressingly long, does it not?
Toward the end, I usually sneak a few more links on the chain so they're not disappointed if he gets delayed.

 In keeping with my plan to return home and acquire the body of a supermodel, I bought a healthy array of foods. A friend posted the recipe for this little gem on facebook:

It's kale soup.
Don't I sound all crunchy and healthy?
The truth is that I've never bought kale before, but the soup wasn't half bad.

Of course, my stomach revolts an hour later thinking that it has eaten nothing at all, but then I serve up another helping of kale soup and tell my stomach to shut up, already, I'm trying to not be so soft and mushy.

Repeat every hour.

When I was making the soup I was talking to myself, which is not unusual.
(For me.)
I added the required spices, set down an empty dispenser and said: "Looks like I'm out of thyme."

And then I realized that was kind of funny. So I laughed.

This moment of humor has been brought to you in part by, Erin needs a life, and our special sponsor, the author of Diet Soups Can Fill You Up, Mr. I.M. Lying.

Beepbeepbeepbeep: This just in-- Man down, Man down. Pat the Bunny has also been infected.
I'm starting to wonder if Alex went around licking the doorknobs or something.

We will never be invited anywhere ever again.

Lo siento, mi familia.
Lo siento.

I will leave you with some parting photographs:

Da boys-

Alex wanted a picture of Daddy to have at night in bed. So I printed one off the computer, on regular paper and not photo paper, and she mounted it on cardboard and colored him in.
And she sleeps with it every night.

PtB reading to the kids while breathing air that was probably already transmitting illness, thought none of us was the wiser at that time.

Getting ready for our night of culture at the theater.

Good news! Elmo did indeed help Grover get his superpowers back!

Now for another dose of kale soup...

Worst blogger ever.

I know.
And it's not getting any better tonight.

There has been packing, and puking, and driving.
Lots and lots of driving.

But I am happy to report that the kids and I are safely back in our North Carolina home, and were welcomed home by temperatures in the mid-60's.
Which is a far cry from Monday, when the door to my minivan was quite literally frozen shut.

Clothes and toys are piled high in the living room, there is no food in the house, and my children are in desperate need of grandparent detox.
So I will make a strong effort to deal with some of those things on the morrow, and will attempt an actual blog post then.

I'm off for a nice sleep in my very own bed! Can't believe it's been two and a half months since that last happened!

Wednesday, again.

It's Wednesday again. That was quick!
Join in the Wed-nes-day hodgepodge right here.

Am I the only one who actually says Wed-nes-day when writing that word? Because I do.

Let's get started...

1. The NFL playoffs were held this past weekend and this year's Superbowl will feature the New York Giants versus The New England Patriots. How do you define 'patriot'?

I define patriot as one Thomas Edward Patrick Brady, Jr.
 You see, he's a Michigan man. And so I am a fan.

I like to say that we went to school together, because we did.
But the truth is that I never set eyes on him on campus except while on the football field.

What? Were you expecting something deeper? Like something about this guy?

Well, he's a patriot, too. And I would rather be married to him than to that other patriot I mentioned.
Thanks for what you do, Joshie!
And for letting me call you Joshie.
And for giving me two great kids.
Who shart in the bathtub while you're deployed.

2. What's something in your life right now that feels like a 'giant'?

My muffin top.

Ha! I kid, I jest.

But who wants to jog with me when I get back to warmer weather?

Well.
In about two months and two weeks from now, we should be living in California.
This seems odd, because I am currently sitting in a house in Michigan with our schtuff scattered all around. My husband is in Afghanistan and wont be home for, oh, about 2 months.
Soon I need to get two kids and a bunch of schtuff to North Carolina. And then somehow we must arrange for that household to be moved to California. And then we've got to figure out how to get us and our vehicles to California. And find a place in which to reside.

But let's think of it as more like a giant adventure, shall we?

3. What's the first thing that comes to mind when you think back to being 18?

Starting college, meeting Josh for the first time but thinking he must be someone's little brother, being on my own and liking it...good times.

4. Coconut-mashed potatoes-vanilla ice cream-mayonnaise...which white food would be the hardest to give up?

I'm going to go with mashed potatoes. Coconut isn't really a big part of my life, and I don't much care for mayo.
Let's get to the heart of the matter-- There are many other flavors of ice cream. So by giving up vanilla, I can keep both potatoes and non-vanilla ice cream.

5. Describe an incident or a day you remember as being the coldest you've ever experienced.

I remember one day of snow skiing that was just bitterly cold and I was forced to stop many times to warm up in the lodge. It was my toes and fingers that were the coldest.
The next day I found out about those warmers they have for your gloves and ski boots.
Ah, hindsight.

6. You're hosting a brunch....what's your favorite dish to prepare and serve?

Oh Joyce, how you make me laugh.
I would never be hosting a brunch.

7. How do you combat negative thinking?

A change of perspective is usually all that I need.
I believe the Bible, and it is more than enough to calm any anxious thought. Not that they wont come back again and again, but the good thing about the scriptures is that you can go back to them again and again.

 James 4:14 says:  Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.


Does it strike you odd that I like that particular verse about how soon I'm going to be dead?
Me too; it's probably because I'm weird.
But it does wonders for perspective.

Really, this life is short. What things really matter?
Having a nicely decorated home? Lots of money? This body?

None of it lasts. (and some of it is photoshopped)

One of my favorite quotes ever was written  by Jim Elliot, who was a missionary who was killed in the mission field. He said, "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain that which he cannot lose."

8. Insert your own random thought here. 

Why no, no I'm not certain that sermons and sharting belong in the same blog post. Thank you for asking.

Day 131

I'm tired, and I shall be retiring shortly. But first I will provide a run-down on our past several days.

-We left the western side of the state and drove back to Pat the Bunny's on Friday. It's only a bit over 2 hours, but it made me remember that soon we will be driving 13 hours back to North Carolina. And while it will be nice to be back in our own house, I am not looking forward to the drive or the unpacking that awaits me.

- I miss my husband. This is news, no?

- September was a long time ago. Like, back when it was hot. And before Halloween. And Thanksgiving. And Christmas. And New Years. And lots of days in between.

- Pity party complete.

- I have a new best friend.

- Allow me to explain.

- Each month we send the guys a "morale calendar." It's a big calendar that the spouses make, and each family takes a 12x12 square for a day of the month. It's covers a wall at their squadron building. We decorate our square and put pictures on it, etc. Mine is predictably lame because I lack the scrapbooking gene that makes a person enjoy such goings-on.
Ergo, this blog.

- I like to use the word ergo. And I like to blog because I enjoy recording our daily lives in a non-scrapbook format. The alternative requires scissors, hard copies of photographs, cute embellishments, and general work.

- Back to my story.

- For February, apparently the idea for the morale calendar was for all the wives to put a photo of themselves on their square. A Valentine's photo, if you will. The word sexy was mentioned. A couple of the girls in the squadron are photographers and were going to take pictures for anyone who didn't have one.

- I am not photogenic, and as luck would have it, I am also not in North Carolina. So I decided to opt out of this month's calendar. But I kept getting e-mails from the commander's wife, Tera, asking where my picture was.

- So I sent her this:

- And bless her heart, she thought that it was actually me.
Or should I say, that more than the face was me.

- She is my new best friend.

- And I also might gently suggest a vision exam.

- I'm getting into my jammie jam jammerkins and going to nighty nite town now.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Hey look. I remembered what day of the week it was while it was still that day of the week.

Join in at Joyce's for the Wednesday Hodgepodge.

1. A new Miss America was crowned on Saturday night-did you watch? If you were a contestant what would your talent be?

 I don't know how I missed it, what with all of the nothing I have penciled in to my schedule these days. Oh yes, there was a football game on that night I do believe.

If I were a contestant I'd probably do some 90's rapping.
It would be an instant you-tube classic.


2. Do you have houseplants? Real or fake?

I tend to neglect until death all living things in my household. I'm actually kind of surprised my kids are still hanging around.
Many moons ago, when I was working in Ye Old United States Air Force, I was given a Christmas cactus by a departing colleague. It was my first and only houseplant. I took it home and it never bloomed, and I never watered it, and I never allowed it any sun, etc.
It was a tad pathetic.
We were living in Texas, and when we moved to North Carolina (the first time people, keep up) I gave it to my Texas next-door-neighbor.
We shared a carport.
Her name was Laurel.
Her husband was in pilot training and they had no kids.

Then we moved to North Carolina for 9 months for Josh's training in the F15E.
Then we moved to Idaho for 3 years where Josh was in an F15E fighter squadron.
Then we moved back to North Carolina where Josh is in an another F15E fighter squadron.
That is currently in Afghanistan.
With my husband.

And who do we find living in our very neighborhood? Yes, the Maplehood?
Laurel and her husband who was no longer in pilot training but in F15E training and her 2 children.
And right before they moved to England, where they now reside, Laurel deposited on my kitchen counter one Christmas cactus from many moons ago that still rarely blooms and is currently probably dead in our house in North Carolina.

The End.

Who would have thought I could be so verbose about plants?

3. When you were in school did you speak up or were you more of the hide your face, avoid eye contact, and pray the teacher didn't call on you type of student?

In retrospect, I should have had the decency to hide my face. And my hair. And my clothes.

But I fear I did not.
Nay, I did not realize the full extent of my nerdiness and I went on about life as if I did not look like the poster child for Nerds of the 80's & 90's.


4. Next Monday marks the Chinese New Year....what do you order when someone suggests Chinese food?


Usually General Tso's chicken. But I'm non-discriminatory. I like all Chinese food.
And Thai food, and American food, and Japanese food, and Mexican food, and . . .


5. How would you define a miracle? What would it take for you to consider something a miracle?

There are many ways to define a miracle. I'll list some:
- Both of my kids sleep in until 9am
- My children inadvertently touch each other under the dinner table and no one makes a noise as if they've been burned
- Derek figures out how to buckle himself into his car seat (Yes. He is FOUR.)
- Josh comes home on time from a deployment.
- I am offered dessert and I say "no, thank you"
- I go to the dentist and don't have a cavity

6. What's your favorite Disney song? If you're stuck you'll find a list here.


Too hard to choose. I love the music from Beauty & the Beast.
Oh, and The Little Mermaid.
And The Lion King.

7. I should have __________yesterday.

 

Showered? No wait, I did that. 

Gone to bed earlier? Yes, that would work.

Oh, and I should have worn a coat when I took the kids to the library. I forgot I needed to get gas, and it was windy and snowy and well, cold.

 

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I'm moving to Spain.
And I'm kind of excited about it. 

Day 125

We have passed the 4-month point in this deployment.

4-ish months is the longest Josh and I have ever been separated in the past, so this is new territory. Josh is still doing great in Afghanistan. He's missing us lots, but, and I quote:  "I've still got the gym, my electric blanket, mustache and gun, so overall it's pretty good."

Dang mustache.

Things are going well for the kids and I here in Michigan as well. I thought I would be way past ready to be home by now. But our family has been so generous and accommodating for all these weeks. We've totally taken over Mom and Mark's house, fridge, and pantry and they just overlook our mess and keep restocking the food.
Dad and Cindy have us over all the time for meals and to take the kids out to play. On Saturday, they picked the kids up at 11am and kept them until bedtime. They played out in the snow, had lots of hot chocolate, went to see Beauty & the Beast in 3-D, ate their body weight in candy and popcorn, and then played in McDonald's playland.
So, as you can imagine, they are officially rotten.

And so am I. Because while Dad & Cindy had the kids, Mom and Mark took me out for an all-you-can-eat crab leg dinner!
Heaven.
There is nothing better in my book.

And we are heading back soon to spend some more time with Pat the Bunny who, as you know, is notorious for indulgence. The kids might be ruined for life.

I'm actually a little nervous to go back to life on my own. It's been so nice to have adult conversation and help with the munchkins.
I'd stay longer if I didn't have things to get back to. I'm hoping Derek can still rejoin his classmates on the bus, I have my Friday morning Bible study responsibilities that I've skipped out on, my friend Ashley will be having Brooke's sister in February, and with our move coming up so fast there are things to do around the house as well as wanting to spend time with friends before we say goodbye.

Plus there are run-on sentences to write.

Whew. Maybe I wont have time to be lonely after all.

But for now, it is Monday and I'm off to school my kid.
Today I will be teaching her the finer points of foot massage. I will be her practice dummy.

Later.

My armpits are blue, and other things.

I took the kids to a museum today.

It was quite nice. We had the place practically to ourselves, and it was free.
I really like free.
Free is my favorite of all the prices.

Alex and I share the same sentiments about ice cream.

Future sportscaster. Boom goes the dynomite.

If you don't get the dynomite reference, then you don't spend enough time on you tube, or you're not married to Josh B. Schore.
Or maybe both.

The kids area was fun.

 

We're supposed to get some snow tonight and tomorrow, so I had to get the hooligans out of the house to burn off some energy.
Oh and Field Trip?
Check.

If that's not enough to put me in the running for homeschooling mom of the year, then maybe this is:

Oh yeah. Arts and Crafts baby.
My play-doh man is awesome, is he not? I just have hidden talents coming out of the woodwork.
I mean, I'm practically fluent in Spanish these days.

Well, as long as you only want to speak in the present tense, and say things like, The girl eats an apple in the kitchen.
We could have really awesome conversations about such things.

I bought a new sweatshirt in a pretty blue color.
It's a good thing I like the color because now my armpits are the same shade.
Really? That happens?

It wouldn't be so surprising if I'd bought the shirt from the dollar store, but I would like an accounting from one J. Crew.

What else?
Oh yes, I'm starting to make my way back to North Carolina. Very slooooooooooowly.
In a week I'm heading back to PtB's to spend a little more time there before making the long drive.

Right now we're still on track for our move to California almost immediately after Josh gets home. So there should be plenty to do to keep me busy between arriving at home and waiting for the news that Josh is on his way.
Can't wait! I'm ready to be a family of four again.