It is our first flight, approximately 2 hours long. There are 2 seats on either side of the aisle, the kids and I are on the right side of the plane, with Josh across the aisle from us. The villain is sitting on the left side of the plane, window seat. He's wearing an "I heart New York" shirt, not to be confused with a shirt that says "I heart kids" because that would be the farthest thing from the truth.
And here's how it goes down...
So in my humble opinion, the kids are doing pretty good on this flight. Chattering and playing, coloring, putting puzzles together, etc. We don't need to break out the DVD player, so you know things are going okay.
The stewardess comes by and comments that they are behaving nicely. Then she moves on to the villain's row, and she seems to be talking with him for an extended amount of time. I can't hear what's going on, but Josh later relays that Mr. New York has asked if she can "do something" about the kids. Her end concession is to bring him earplugs.
Mr. New York wears said earplugs for the rest of the flight.
Kids behave like kids for the rest of the flight, fairly good in my estimation. Occasional whining, but mostly just normal kid behavior. Over the course of the flight, amongst other food they eat: Alex- 2 twizzler sticks, 1 dum-dum lollipop; Derek- 1 twizzler stick, 1 dum-dum lollipop. (Bear with me, this info will come in handy later in this mini-novel.)
Fast forward to the end of the flight. I am now sitting on the left side of the plane, while Josh takes a turn with A & D (the children, not the ointment). As we are taxiing into the airport, I hear Mr. New York begin to complain to the woman sitting next to him. It actually doesn't register with me right away that he is talking about us, but it eventually becomes obvious that he must indeed be. Things I overhear* him say:
* technically, "overhear" would be generous. I couldn't not hear because he is talking in a voice that certainly he intends me to hear
"That is just disgusting. They just stuffed those kids full of sugar and then I had to suffer through the flight listening to them."
"They need to teach those kids to respect the environment around them, not just throw candy at them."
"I can't believe I had to endure that for 2 hours."
And on, and on, and on. I get angrier and angrier. The woman beside him finally replies to his complaints by saying that she thinks their behavior was quite normal. Mr. New York says "Normal? You've got to be kidding me..." And then he starts in again with the disgusting, suffering, and disrespectful crap.
I can't take it anymore. My normally confrontation-avoiding self can't contain my outrage so I turn around and spew forth exactly what I'm thinking:
"How dare you talk about my family that way?! My children are behaving appropriately and you are incredibly rude."
Mr New York's clever reply: "I'm not talking to you."
Me: "Well I'm talking to you. I hope we're on your next flight sitting right behind you. I'll make sure my kids kick your seat. So sorry for your suffering."
(Obviously I'm not very good at taking the high road when I'm angry. And in retrospect, there were so many better things I could have said. I know because I ran through it in my head all day. Why can't I ever think of the clever stuff in the heat of the moment??)
We managed to avoid further altercation for the rest of the taxi. The lady sitting next to Mr. New York engaged Alex in some conversation and thanked her for being entertaining. She had enjoyed watching her play and color.
We leave the plane. I'm still angry.
I get a bread bowl with lobster bisque.
I feel better.
Mr. New York didn't know that when I get hungry, I get angry.