Friday, December 17, 2010


In a sad turn of events, the vomit comet landed on our house yesterday and remains smoldering in the living room.
Currently illness has been limited to the pint-sized humans, and I'm hoping it remains that way.

Being up in the night cleaning puke got me to thinking. It would be awesome if someone would invent some sort of disposable bag that could be attached to childrens mouths to catch spontaneous vomit, without obstructing their breathing.

Do you know what happens when someone throws up while laying on their back?
I do.

If human beings were more practical, we wouldn't allow our sick children the comfort of blankets and pillows when ill. We would just crank up the heat and make them lay naked on a bed made of plastic. It would make clean-up so much easier.

Anyway, let's move on.

******Public Service Announcement: 8 days until Christmas******

My father in law is in town. He's probably wishing he weren't, what with the whole vomit comet thing going on.
Here's a story for you--

On Tuesday Derek, Boppa, and I went out to lunch. When we got home, we noticed that one of the smoke detectors in the hallway was chirping.

This particular hallway is home to 3 bedrooms, each of which has a smoke detector, plus an additional detector in the hallway.
What can I say?
We're safety conscious people. We have signs posted all over the house.

                                                                          Safety First. 
Falling objects can be brutal if you don’t protect your noodle

                                                         Safety glasses: All in favour, say “Eye!”

However, 4 smoke detectors in the same hallway makes it a little difficult to figure out exactly which one is chirping, especially since the chirping was rather sporadic.
So we go about our day, and after several hours of hearing the chirping, we decided we should probably try to figure out which one it is.
First, we try standing in the hallway. Still no luck being able to tell exactly which one it is.
Then we take turns taking each of the removable ones out of the bedroom and into the living room with us, thinking we'd hear it for sure that way.
It wasn't any of those, which made it seem obvious that it must be the hallway one wired to the house.
Eventually after Josh got home from work, the three of us were staked out underneath that one, waiting and listening.
Nope. Not it.
Seems to be coming from the guest room. We confirm with Boppa that he has no electronics hiding in there, he assures us that no, he does not.
We don't believe him.
Because he is old.
(Hi Boppa! Just kidding about that!)
We enter the room, and I immediately see in his "electronic-free" zone, a cell phone.

After hours of chirp-searching, the truth is revealed:
Boppa had a new text message.

I hope it was a good one.

This just in:
 As I was typing this post, my children, who have been spoiled rotten since feeling ill, and are spoiled in general with the conveniences of modern life, just had a hairy conniption because a commercial dare interrupt their viewing of Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer.
Alex looked around from her spot under 2 blankets and holding a bucket, spotted the remote control across the room, and asked Boppa to fast forward through the commercials.
Boppa, not being located anywhere near the remote control, told her that he didn't have the remote.
Alex, always polite and respectful of her elders replied,
"You have feet, Boppa, can't you just walk over and get it?"


I wish you all a Merry Christmas Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve. And may the puke bug not find you.

Or me.


Taylor said...

We tried to trick the puke bug and go out of town. The puke bug found us.

Erin said...

It gets better as they get older. Malachi now takes a blanket and just sleeps on the bathroom floor. We just go in and check on him every 20-30 minutes while he is active :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the laughs!! I really needed them today!