Friday, July 15, 2011

The D word.

Last night, I co-hosted a squadron spouses' coffee with my friend Amy.
We had it at our community pool, which can be reserved for private events one night a week. Thankfully the weather was a little cooler and the humidity dropped, making it a perfect night to have an outdoor event.
Hostessing is soooooo not in my comfort-zone, so I was happy to check that off my calendar. Thankfully Amy is super organized and a great hostess, so she made up for me.

It pays to be friends with your opposites.

Amy also always has a clean house AND she wears pants when she's at home.
So you see, we are like yin and yang.

The spouses meet once each month to talk "business."
We do fundraisers for squadron events, we coordinate meals for new parents, deliver meals to the guys when they are night-flying, and any myriad of other things that come up. It's also a way to establish friendships with the ladies who all get left behind together during deployments.

And for now, the talk is all deployment, all the time.
It's the D word. I can't get away from it.
So my apologies if this blog takes the same slant.

Josh is on leave this week, and the D word has been intruding on our time together as well.
Ever the prepared one, he has a long checklist of things to go over with me before he leaves.
He is so thoughtful, trying to think of anything that I might want or need to know, while I would prefer to plug my ears and pretend he isn't leaving.

Some of it is easier to talk through than other things.

We discussed the what-if's regarding that dang house in Idaho that we can't get rid of. We talk about vehicle maintenance, where the circuit breaker is in the garage, replacing the A/C filters, etc.
That's the easy stuff.

The hard stuff is when he shows me where the life insurance paperwork is, and goes over our financial binder, just in case. Or when he casually mentions that he'll be going by the finance office to up his servicemember's life insurance policy.
This is when I politely interrupt with my, "You are planning on coming home, aren't you?"

Through his squadron, we have to complete emergency data forms. Honestly, they are good tools to have for every family, military or not. But when you know he's leaving for war and you have to complete some tough questions... well, let's just say that you do not want to fill this out if you're having an emotional day.

They want to know who you would like to have called in the event that your spouse dies, who they should call to take care of your children, whether or not you would like your spouse to have a military burial, and on and on.

Well this has gotten entirely too depressing.
Topic Change!

Did I mention that Josh is on leave right now? It's been a great few days of having him home. He has been doing a ton of the childcare. He's been giving baths, putting kids to bed and down for naps. He took Alex to her dentist appointment, and right now he is at the movies with the monsters.
They went to see Cars 2, and mama is enjoying some free time.

Oh, and I've been sleeping in every morning! He spoils me, and I love him.

We are planning a little jaunt up to Virgina, where we will hit the beach, hang out with our friend Nicole, and take the kids to Busch Gardens.
Cheers to their company for continuing their "Here's to the Heroes" special, which allows military families a free day in the park. We are happy to take advantage of it, again.
We went last year as well, only we left the kids at home!

Happy Weekend to You!


js said...

Tell him to go to the office formerly known as MPF for the life insurance stuff; CPTS does not handle SGLI forms. It's pretty much the only document you still have to do hard-copy. But I'm sure he's already found that out.

Joyce said...

I think it's good to write about it. Maybe not so much for you but for people reading, there are things we'd all prefer not to think and talk about. We discuss war like its a political topic and I think in order for people to appreciate the sacrifice the military and their families make they have to know what the real life deal is. I hope you enjoy your holiday and quality family time!

Proverbs 31 Wannabe said...

Enjoy your family time and vacation. I know it has to be hard knowing he's about to leave. I admire your strength. I also appreciate so much the sacrifice you and your kids are making for our country.

Trey and Mel's Piece of the Net! said...

Ok, so Ive been reading about your situation and it breaks my heart every time I think about your kiddos. Well, yesterday the "D word" became a four letter word in our house, for the first time since we've been married. Trey just found out he is leaving in October and I already miss him. Since you are (unfortunately) more experienced than I, do you have any tips on how I can get through the days without welling up every time I look at the boys and think about how much they will miss their Daddy? I don't think I am made for this whole 'military wife' thing.

Taylor said...

I am glad you share it, not because I think it is a good realty check for me. I am kind of ignorant to this life and take the men and women who serve our country for granted. So, share away. It's real life-its' your life. And we are reading this blog because we like to hear about your life and we care about you! Thank you for your sacrifice and thank you to Josh.

Heather and Scott said...

I love you, sweet friend.

trooppetrie said...

the D word has hit our house again, i was not ready for it to come so soon but it looks like next spring is D day for us

Elaine said...

hit us too. :( feel your pain on the "uncomfortable topics" I really don't enjoy discussing in detail life support and loss of limbs. Really not liking this deployment since he will be on ground with Army green berets in the middle of who knows where instead of what should be a comfy AF deployment in an office chair (for all the nonfliers:P)
But something to make you smile...
When Arby told Sefton he was leaving he replied "Are we gonna have another baby?" He answered no and Sefton was like umm, are you sure? lol. Just because the last 2 came that way does not mean the rest will or that would be wayyy too many babies!