Hodgepodge

It's been forevah since I've joined in on the 'ol hodgepodge at Joyce's page. So let's, shall we?

You can too. Everybody's doing it. Don't be lame. 

Yes, Mother. I'd jump off the bridge, too.
I'm a great swimmer.

1. The Wednesday Hodgepodge falls on John Chapman's birth date.  He's more famously known as Johnny Appleseed...what's your favorite variety of apple?

I like McIntosh, Gala, and we just had the best bag of Pink Lady apples. So they might be my new favorite. 

2. When did you last say 'ick'?

This morning when I was brushing Derek's teeth before school. I noticed a dark layer at the bottom of his bristles that I am fairly sure is Oreo residue, but I didn't want to look too closely in case it is moldy residue and so I just tossed the brush in the trash.

Ick. 

3.  Do you think there's a generation gap?  Explain.

Sometimes I think how odd life must seem to the oldest in our society compared with the "young folks these days."  I think I could blow my Grandma's mind just by showing her how to FaceTime on an iPad. Like, literally. Her mind might explode.
She still thinks that when we talk on the phone, we have to get off within a minute so as not to make my phone bill too big.
I bet if I took her to a high school she would wonder why there were so many prostitutes running around. I mean, have you seen what teenagers are wearing these days?


4.  What's on your computer screen saver?  Do you change it often or leave it alone?

I forget about it. I had to close my web browser to check just now. 
 It's this picture of Alex. I love this picture.

 5.  If you had the attention of the entire world for two minutes what would you say?

Oh, I'd be preaching. Heaven, Hell, Jesus.
You know.
2 minutes isn't very long, but I could break it down quick.

6.  Four fashion trends to try this fall are brocade/jacquard (fancy fabrics), peplum, lace, and printed pants...which of these four would you be most likely to wear?

Was that English?
Peplum? Jacquard? Should I know what that is?

I'm probably going to be mistaken for a bum on the streets of Madrid. From what I hear, jeans and sneakers are not commonly worn. So I'm just going to stay inside a lot. I mean, for me, to wear jeans is to dress up.

7.  What can make your bad day better?

Well, my bad days are rather predictable. Cyclical, you might say. I have about 2 a month, back to back, and the only thing that helps is to wait to 2 days.

Oh, and for no one to talk to me.


8.  Insert your own random thought here. 

We had  a rough morning getting ready for school, even before the black fungus of the toothbrush.
Last week we went to the Wharf (again) for clam chowder and crepes (again), and we let the kids pick out a magnet in one of the tourist shops. Josh has been buying them magnets of the places we've been or he's been for the past several years.

Except Afghanistan. Would you believe there's no souvenir shop there?
Not even a "My Dad Went to Afghanistan and All I Got Was This Magnet."

He did bring home some 20-mm casings from large bullets he shot at people, but that's not exactly the kind of thing you celebrate on the fridge, ya know?

Anyway, the kids picked a fun blue octopus that says Monterey and has boingy legs you can boing. Great fun.
The kids named him Oct the Octopus (despite my awesome suggestion of Ocho. Is that not a better name?). They have drawn his picture and relish his existence.

I knocked him off the fridge this morning and he lost a leg.
Alex cried.
I was already a little flustered by her slow as molasses movement all morning long, and this was the last straw. Crying over a magnet?
Alex: He's not an OCTOpus anymore! Wahhhh.
Me: You're right. He's a septopus, stop crying and finish your waffle.
Alex: Wahhhhh
Me: Alex, he's still fine, he's still a part of the fridge family. If you lost an appendage, we would still love you.
Alex: Leaves table in distress.

Josh tried to glue the leg back on to no avail, and finally reasoned with her that it's like some predator had bitten off the octopus' leg, and we have a special one now.

Special Septopus.
I guess it's good we didn't name him Ocho.