Coming out of the Closet: Box Day

So.
I'm just going to come out and say it:

I have purchased some homeschool curriculum. 

There, now I'm out of the closet. 

I know this might surprise some of you. 
I don't have long hair or denim jumpers, but I think other homeschool moms who do will be totally understanding of the fact that my hair gets really stringy and gross when I try to grow it out. 
And we all know that denim just doesn't suit me. 

Some of you might recall that I've hemmed and hawed over this decision before. 
And then after hemming and hawing, I did some more hemming and hawing. 
Then I sent my daughter off to public school kindergarten.

And it's been great. She's loved it. 

But then I started hemming and hawing again.

As I may have mentioned a time or ten, my dearly beloved will not be home for most of the next school year.  Apparently his mad war-fighting capabilities are more useful elsewhere.


This leaves me and my little lovelies alone in small-town America, chained to the school schedule. 

Or does it??
There is an alternative... 

And so I began my research.
(In the interest of full disclosure, there is nothing that I research quite as in depth as our Disney vacations.)

I looked around at all of the websites for curriculum. My criteria was that it be a Christian-based program and that Alex's schooling not consist of a bunch of worksheets.
Boring.

Well, I found what I was looking for in Sonlight curriculum.

To be honest, I was hoping I wouldn't like Sonlight. I'd heard that they were more expensive than some other programs. And you guys know I have a tendency to be...cheap.

But I couldn't help it.
I loved their concept of learning through great literature.
And there is a complete instructor's guide that has the entire school year scheduled out, along with everything I need to teach her. I don't have to plan anything. I don't have to come up with comprehension questions, I don't have to look for the answers. It's all right there, in a huge binder, ready to start each day.
Since I'm trying this as a temporarily-single parent, that alone is worth the extra cost.

Yesterday our box arrived.

Book after book was pulled out and exclaimed over.

We'll be studying world history with these bright and colorful books that are full of pictures.

There are lots of readers for Alex to make her way through.

And then there are oodles of read-alouds-- books that I will read to her. I think a little girl who is missing her daddy might enjoy a lot of time cuddling on the couch reading with mommy.

Or maybe I'm wrong and all she'll want to do is play the Wii.
The verdict's still out.

My plan is to get started with the basic "core" during the summer. That way, if I I feel like it's just not for us, I can still put Alex in school in the fall.
And Sonlight has an awesome return policy.

(Pat the Bunny, are you doing okay? I waited to break the news until you had a new grandchild to hold. That way if you're scared that I'm ruining one, you'll have another as backup.)


If we like it, then I'll add math and maybe science for the fall.
And I'll pull this out of the closet.

Happy Wednesday, interpeeps.

Dia de las Madres

Today the children woke up at 7am.
They did not get the memo that it was Mother's Day and my one wish was to sleep in.

So I did what any good mother would do.
I gave them a juice box and a pop tart.
I turned on the Disney channel.
And I went back to bed.

Surprisingly, it worked.
No one came to tell me that they needed to go to the bathroom. I did not hear any fist fights breaking out. Derek didn't even bring me his empty juice box when he was done, as is his habit.

(Sometimes he confuses me for the trash can. I haven't figured out why.)

So I enjoyed snoozing until around 9am, when I realized that I should probably turn the television off.
I don't often advocate hours of TV on end, but I do believe there is a time and a place for everything.

We had a pretty good day. We go to church on Saturday nights, so Sundays truly are relaxing mornings for us. I got all productive and washed everyone's sheets. Then I made all the beds up fresh and clean.

So naturally Derek wet his bed at naptime. An impressive feat when you consider he was wearing a pull-up.
I haven't figured out why that happens either.

We got together for our Bible study, despite the fact that all of our husbands were missing. It was a nice time to chat with the other girls though, while a babysitter kept the hoodlums out of the way.

We've had a nice weekend, I hope you have, too!

Happy Mother's Day to my mom. Thanks for having a second child, even though epidurals weren't widely available.
I'm totally worth it.
Right?

Baby talk.

I'm an aunt again! Josh's sister and her husband welcomed a sweet baby boy into the world yesterday.

His name is Caleb, and he will now be the third child to fall victim to the incredible spoiling force that is Pat the Bunny.

It's times like these that it is so hard to live far away from family.

I want to be there to hold that smooshy baby while he's little and floppy. 
I want to see if he has hairy ears and marvel at the size of his tiny diapers.
I want to witness the glazed look on the faces of the new parents as they begin to realize what sleep deprivation really feels like.

And then I want to laugh at them.

Ha! I'm joking!
I don't want to laugh at them.
I want to tell them that one day, they will sleep for five hours. In a row.
And they will feel like brand new people.

And then I'll tell them that one day, that baby, who looks like innocence wrapped in perfection, will cause them to have to walk out of the room lest they act on their impulse to cause him some physical pain.
It will happen.

For me it usually happens at bathtime.

Because the room is small, hot, and loud. And they are no longer innocence wrapped in perfection. And someone is always on someone else's side of the tub, and someone will always splash someone else, and there will be weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth when someone takes the coveted cup from the other one.

I kind of got off topic.
But I really would love to hold my new nephew.

When I saw this picture of him today:

It totally reminded me of when my Derek was newly born, and laying in his blue boppy:

Which reminded me that I don't think I've ever shared the way that I deceived the medical community into inducing my labor with said child.

So now I shall tell you.

Warning: This story contains words like dilated and effaced. Feel free to disengage now if this makes you uncomfortable. 

Many moons ago, I was great with child.
Very great.
Like 40 lbs great.

It was about a week and a half or so before my due date, but all of the doctors were surprised he hadn't made his arrival yet, because I had been fairly well dilated and effaced for quite some time, and he was head down and low.

My mom, who was desperate to be present for the birth (she wasn't able to be there for Alex's delivery), had moved her tickets up because she was so sure that he would come early.
Well, come he did not.
We tried all of the tricks. Including the one that I am now convinced was invented by males and is a total fallacy.
Ahem.

As we neared the end of my mother's visit, I had my weekly appointment.
They took my blood pressure and it was mildly elevated. The doctor decided I should go over to the labor & delivery unit to be hooked up to the monitors for an hour and get more frequent readings.

This doctor was brand new to the base clinic, and I did not offer all of the information that I could have. For instance, the blood pressure machine they used at my appointment always gave high readings. It needed to be repaired. In the past, after getting a high reading with that machine, they would retake my BP w/ a manual sphygmomanometer* and the results would be normal.

*This is the actual term for the instrument that takes your blood pressure. Don't say you never learn anything here.

So I was fairly confident that after an hour at L&D, I'd be packing up and heading home.

But I'm a tricky sort, and I quite wanted that baby to come out that very day.
So as I laid there in the bed, every time the blood pressure cuff would inflate, I would bear down and strain my arm muscles.

I know, I know. I was totally using my nursing knowledge for evil.
*Head hung in shame*

About 2 readings later, they came over to admit me and start the pitocin.
I won.

Derek was born about 2 hours later.

Welcome to the world, Caleb!

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Look at me acting like a real blogger with two posts in one day!
I've missed out on the Hodgepodge the past couple weeks, so I have to jump back in.

Want to play along? Visit Joyce and link up!

1. Have you ever been served breakfast in bed? Did you enjoy that? If someone were serving you breakfast in bed this coming weekend what would you hope to see on the tray?

Well, once for my birthday Josh & the kids brought me a plate of cake and milk into bed.  He knows that I feel there’s never a wrong time to have dessert.

I don’t think there’s a chance that I’ll be receiving breakfast in bed this weekend. If I did, eating it would violate my rule about not eating things that children prepare. 

You know what happened the last time I did that. 

2. What is one piece of advice you would give a new mother?

I don’t give advice, I just point and laugh.

Kidding!

I tell them that crying is normal. 

Oh, and it’s okay if the baby cries, too.

3. When was the last time you wanted to scream? Explain.

I think the last thing that got me really frustrated was dealing with our previous renter while he was preparing to move out.  Josh and I had to practice bring mature adults, since he decided not to. It was a good learning experience for us as landlords, and that’s the most positive spin I can put on it. 

4. Can you hula hoop? 

Hula hooping has been a big topic of conversation around here lately. Last week, we took the kids to the store. Alex had been saving her dollar from the tooth fairy, a $2 bill she got for Valentine's day, and $5 she got in an Easter card. It was just enough to buy the $8 light-up hula hoop she desperately wanted. 

That girl came home, and hula'd her little heart out. She was so proud that she figured it out. She actually bruised her hips from doing it so much. 

As for me, I have a weighted hula hoop that is supposed to work your core. I haven't seen a lot of results, but that's probably because it's been hanging in the garage since we moved here. 

Today I vow to remove it from the garage, and hula for 30 minutes while I watch a TV show tonight. 

I'll let you know how that turns out.

5. What is something people do in traffic that really bothers you?

Here in the south, people take things a little slower.
This includes accelerating from a red light when it turns green.
It feels like each person waits to see the guy in front of them drive off, then they think to themselves "Well, y'all, it seems that maybe I should start moving now. Let me take this here foot off the break and give 'er a go."
By this time the light is yellow.

We Yankees like things to move a little faster.
This same phenomenon happens at the checkout counters, too. Each person has to have their conversation with the cashier while my ice cream melts.

I love the friendliness, just wish I could make it a faster kind of friendly.

6. What do you do when people don't admit they're wrong?

I think for me it would depend on the situation. I'm not confrontational, so I probably wouldn't do anything. Then I'd brush it off.
Or maybe hold a grudge for the next few decades.


Luckily, I'm married to a man who is actually very good at doing this. Unfortunately for him, he's married to a woman who isn't.

7. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word 'fun'?

I think of my family doing an activity together that we all enjoy. Right now, our upcoming Disney trip pops into my thoughts.
Holla, Mickey Mouse!

8. Insert your own random thought here.
Yesterday my uncle got all photo-happy on Facebook and started tagging me in old pictures. In one of them I was 14 years old, and wearing shorts that came up to my rib cage, over a shirt that I know snapped at the crotch.
The teenager onesie.

Oh, the humanity.

Rainy Morning

It is rainy.
Since I might melt if I go out, I'm using the weather as an excuse to have a cuddly morning on the couch with my favorite three year old.

He's been giving me nuzzles, and snuggles, and eating his body weight in wabbles.
But he does NOT like syrup on his wabbles and he is not afraid to tell you.

I rarely make coffee, but I thought this would be a good day for it.
But I used too much sugar in my cup, as is wont to happen when you pour it directly from the 5lb sugar bag into your mug. So I had to find a bigger mug so that I could add more coffee.

Now I find myself drinking coffee while my thumb rests on some ceramic breasts.

Do you think the makers of this mug specifically had a fighter squadron in mind when they designed it?
That, or maybe a swag bag at an adult entertainment convention.
I have to admit, I've found myself absentmindedly rubbing that area of the handle, and it's left me feeling confused.

Ahem.

Yesterday Alex brought home some school pictures. I found this odd because I didn't order any.
Apparently the new way of doing things is to send home the pictures and ask for payment, and then I have to return the pictures that I don't want.

So, back in the backpack they all went.
I have no shame.
I will not be guilted into buying pictures of my daughter sitting in front of a waterfall, with a strand of hair stuck to her nose, and her socks pulled up.

Somebody give Pat the Bunny a paper bag. She's probably hyperventilating because I didn't give her the chance to get one.
It's okay, PtB. I take plenty of pictures of that girl. I'll even send you some if I ever get around to printing any.

This one made me laugh.

It looks fine like that, but when you see it here...

...you realize that her elbow is not actually resting on anything.
It just looks like she's punching herself in the head.

Oh, I love that girl.


I'm going back to my coffee now.
Happy Wednesday.

Cuddlywufflegist

Don't ask about that title. You don't want to know.
We may have taken pet names to a whole 'notha level. 

Today is the birthday of my sweet hubby.
So I guess I can't say that Pat the Bunny never did anything right.

Not that I would ever say that, of course.

To celebrate his birthday, I put the kids to bed at 6:55pm.
Happy Birthday to me!

I love you, Josh. More and more every year. Thanks for being awesome.
It takes the attention off me.

Love,
Snugglywufflegist and spawn

A Busy Day.

The rugrats and I have been keeping busy this weekend.

On Saturday after Alex's dance class, we met some friends at a local pick-your-own strawberry farm.

What could be more fun than 6 kids, ages 5 & under, running wild through a field of strawberries?

Well, probably lots of things.
But we had a good time anyway.

True fact: despite appearances to the contrary, none of the children in that last picture are twins.

The little guy in the front belongs to my friend Alyssa. She is pregnant with her second boy, and she was able to wear her normal jeans AND BELT to her 20 week ultrasound appointment.
For real.
I'm not sure we can be friends anymore.

The three on the left belong to my friend Amy. (You know, the one who gave me the grapefruit spoon.)
Her oldest, Kaylynn, is Alex's good friend and is almost exactly one year older than her sister, Emily.
And despite the fact that Alex could rest her chin on the top of Kaylynn's head, Alex is just 8 months older than her.

They are both classic firstborns, who like things their way. They battle it out for the alpha dog position.


And they're off!

It was a gorgeous day! This whole weekend has been wonderful-- mid 70's, low humidity.

Alex only let me get a few picture of her before she took off for the other side of the field.

Derek wouldn't let me get more than a foot away from him. He needed constant reassurance that yes, that is a great strawberry and why don't you go ahead and pick it.

He usually doesn't like to get his hands messy (I know! Weird kid!), so I loved seeing his grimy little paws crushing the crud out of strawberries.

He is also typically not my fruit-eater.
It must have been backwards day.

Little Andrew liked them too. Green tops & all.

Another one! (He's still trying to keep his hands clean, can you tell?)

This is my favorite picture of the day. This little guys is Kaylynn & Emily's brother, also named Andrew. He's a little flirt, and he really is just a sweet baby boy.
Who apparently likes strawberries.

The loot!

Afterward, we took our messy crew to Chik-fil-A for lunch. Then home for naps*.

*this word is never meant to indicate that any children actually slept, because in all likelihood they did not. 

And look what happened during faux-nap time!

What a day!